Jim C. Hines
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June 15, 2014 /

Continuum GoH Speech

This is my guest of honor speech from Continuum 10 in Melbourne, minus the parts where I stumbled over my words or misread anything…

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First of all, I want to thank Continuum for inviting me, and to thank all of the volunteers who have been working so hard to put this event together.

I grew up in the dark ages, before the internet. I think that’s one of the reasons I didn’t discover fandom when I was young. The closest I came was when my father took my brother and me to a Star Trek convention for an afternoon. There were some awesome (and too expensive) toys, and I got to listen to George Takei and get his autograph, but that was it. I didn’t get a sense of community or belonging. It was more like being in the world’s geekiest toy store. So, you know, still an awesome way to spend the day.

And then, years later, I started writing. This was in the late nineties, which meant I could now dial out on my 56K modem to connect to the World Wide Web and check out the bulletin boards where other newbie writers hung out. I learned how to avoid writing scams, where to find markets for my work, and so on. I also learned about this phenomenon called conventions, where writers and fans got together and did stuff. As a wannabe writer, it sounded like something I should do.

My very first convention was just ten minutes from my house, in Michigan. How had I never heard of this? I signed up for a one-day membership and even got scheduled a reading and a couple of panels.

It went … badly. I showed up at the Holiday Inn, got registered, looked around at the strangers swarming through the halls, and asked myself what the hell I was doing here. I’ve always been an introvert, and this was too much. I remember going to my very first panel, introducing myself, and then not saying a single word for the rest of the hour. My reading had two attendees: my wife, and the author who had been reading before me and stuck around, I’m assuming because he felt bad for me.

What I don’t remember is what made me try again, but I did. Maybe it was stubbornness. Maybe I’m just a masochist — actually, those are some of the same reasons I ended up becoming a writer, now that I think about it. Anyway, I ended up going to World Fantasy Con next … because apparently a little local con wasn’t overwhelming enough for me. Once again I showed up, got registered, and wandered aimless and lost. I sat in on a few panels, because panels were both informative and safe. And then a little later, I found my way to the con suite, where I spotted author Jay Lake and artist Frank Wu, two people I had heard of from those online bulletin boards.

It took an absurdly long time for me to work up the courage to go introduce myself, but eventually I did. They were kind enough to invite me to sit down and join them. We chatted for a bit, and they asked if I was new to the con scene. And then they did something I’ll never forget. They took me around and introduced me to some of the other fans and writers at the convention.

I remember that day because it was the first time I started to feel welcome in fandom. I don’t know that either one of them would remember that day, but I will always be grateful to them for that kindness.

Fast forward to 2014, and I’m attending at least a half-dozen conventions a year, and loving it! I’m the freaking Guest of Honor at Continuum 10 in Australia. How the heck did that happen?

It happened in part because people made me feel welcome. They invited me into this big, geeky, snarky, Monty Python-quoting, book-loving, cranky, wonderful family, and I discovered I wasn’t alone. I found people who loved the things I loved. Who introduced me to new stories and new authors and new shows. Over time, I began to feel at home.

There’s been a lot of discussion and debate about inclusion in fandom and genre. For me, it goes back to that World Fantasy con twelve years ago. Because it wasn’t enough for me to know conventions existed. I needed someone to welcome me in.

How much harder must it be for people who feel actively unwanted? Nobody ever asked me to prove my geek cred, but women are challenged because everyone knows those “fake geek girls” girls don’t belong in science fiction and fantasy and gaming and so on. The day I wrote this speech, award-winning author Mary Robinette Kowal did a Q&A online and had to deal with another guy explaining how he didn’t read books with female protagonists.

I’ve talked about the lack of racial diversity at conventions and in the makeup of con volunteers, only to be told that the real problem is that black people don’t read science fiction and fantasy. Or in one case, to be told that “those people” just don’t read, period. I’ve been accused of pushing a political agenda for including characters whose sexuality isn’t “normal.” (Though, oddly enough, nobody ever tells me I’m pushing an agenda when I write about straight, monogamous characters.)

People ask to see characters like themselves in our stories, and to judge from the backlash from certain folks, you might as well have asked them to pass a porcupine. Apparently, talking about diversity and representation is a secret plot, masterminded by people who want to DESTROY THE GENRE!!!

I wish I was exaggerating.

I’ve rarely seen anyone deliberately posting “no girls allowed” or “whites only” signs on the clubhouse, and that’s a good thing. But it’s not enough. We send messages about who is and isn’t welcome in a thousand other, subtler ways.

It’s not enough to passively sit back and hope more people will somehow, magically find their way into fandom. I know how hard it was for me at that first convention. How much harder is it for people who never see themselves in our stories? For fans who pour so much time and money and work into cosplay, only to be harassed and groped and told they’re just looking for attention? For authors who write amazing stories that are dismissed and ignored, because the author happened to have girl cooties?

It’s easy not to see these things when they’re not about you. I’ve never felt discriminated against for my race or my gender or my sexual orientation, so it’s simple for me to assume that sort of thing doesn’t happen to others. Or yeah, I guess it happens occasionally, but it’s not that big a deal, right? Those people are just blowing things out of proportion, or looking for things to be offended by. It’s so easy for me to dismiss other people’s pain.

Maybe that one joke on Big Bang Theory about how no one has ever seen a pretty girl in a comic book shop isn’t, by itself, a big deal. But it’s not just one joke. It’s a constant flood of messages whispering about who does and doesn’t belong. It’s cover art that reduces women to sexual objects, helpless to do anything but thrust their butt and boobs at you. It’s stories that treat rape as a mandatory plot twist for female character development. It’s the ongoing practice of using white actors to play characters of color vs. the hurricane-strength crapstorm that rolls in the moment someone casts a black actor to play Johnny Storm. It’s editors saying they’d be happy to buy that book, but only if the author makes the gay character straight.

When I get a paper cut, it stings, but it’s not the end of the world. I might swear a bit, but I grab a band-aid and I get on with my life. And then someone else goes online to write this big, long blog post about their own paper cut, and maybe I’m thinking, “Why are you making a mountain out of a molehill?” Because I ignore the fact that for them, it isn’t just one paper cut, but one of a thousand they’ve suffered this week. A single paper cut is annoying. A thousand, and you’re being flayed alive.

I love fandom. I love this community. And I want other people to find that sense of coming home. I want them to feel a part of our stories and our celebrations. I want them to feel welcome.

If this is your first convention, or if you’re feeling as overwhelmed or out of place as I did all those years ago in Michigan, I want to invite you to please come and say hello. We’ll talk about why David Tennant is the best Doctor, or geek out about Avatar: The Last Airbender, or just grumble about the fact that DC still won’t give us a Wonder Woman movie because it’s “too complicated,” when Marvel’s busy promoting a raccoon with a rocket launcher.

And to those of us who have been a part of the community for a while now, I want to remind us all how large our family really is, and how important it is to listen to other voices. I’d encourage us to actively expand our fandom, to explore new stories, to seek out new films and new novelizations, to boldly go—

Wait, sorry. That’s Star Trek.

My point is, there are a lot of people standing near the margins and feeling unwanted or excluded or invisible. Fandom is amazing, but we also have a lot of work to do. You and I may not be able to change the world, or to single-handedly fix the various systemic and cultural inequities that play out in genre and publishing and fandom and everywhere else.

But we can listen. And we can choose to actively reach out and welcome people into our community.

Believe me, it can make all the difference in the world.

Thank you.

June 14, 2014 /

Flashback: June 14, 2002

Assuming all went well, I should be back from Australia by now. But I expect to be utterly exhausted and not up for blogging, so I figured I’d run one last blast from the blogging past.

In June of 2002, I was working as a computer tech for the Michigan Department of Transportation. This could be … frustrating, at times.

Oh, and the story I was working on, “No Worries, Partner,” eventually sold to the anthology Modern Magic.

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June 14, 2002 “Casting ‘Cure Xerox Printer'”

Working on: “No Worries, Partner”

Today’s Word Count: 969

Why Life is Not Like a Role-Playing Game:

Game Master (GM): When you try to print out your document, you find that the color printer is jammed.  What do you do?
Random Computer User from 4th Floor (RCU): I open up the printer to see if I can find the paper.
GM: (Makes a few dice rolls)  You see a bit of white trapped among the ink cartridges and the fuser.  I’d like to remind you that you don’t have the Repair Printer skill.
RCU: I’ll use my intelligence statistic.  I grab the fuser and yank it out.
GM: (Rolls the dice)  You burn yourself.
RCU: I try again.
GM: (Rolls his/her eyes)  You sustain two points of damage, but you finally get the fuser out.
RCU: I yank the paper out.
GM: (Makes another die roll)  It tears, leaving an inaccessible strip of paper jammed in the fuser.  You also notice that there’s two more sheets of paper jammed in the printer, one on the right side, and one beneath the ink cartridges.
RCU: Can I cast “Summon Computer Technician”?
GM: Make your spellcasting roll.

So why is life not like a role-playing game?  Simple.  In your average RPG, the Computer Technician, once summoned to see the mess made by RCU, would have cast fireball on the printer and transformed the user into a toad.  Or maybe I’ve got that backwards.  Nonetheless, I instead managed to restrain myself, and after a half-hour of work, the printer was functional again.  Consider it the real-life version of a Healing spell.

I also did a bit more work on the story.  (Though, to be honest, writing the snippit above was more fun!)  I had my characters deal with the ghost and move on to the dead guitarist.  I’m still trying to get a feel for my protagonist’s character… he’s overworked and overstressed, but I need more.  Same for the secondary, Rhian.  Neither one is really fleshed out just yet, and it makes it harder for me to figure out where the story should go.

Still, it’s progress.  Two big scenes down, and who knows how much to go.

June 13, 2014 /

Flashback: June 13, 2008

Tonight I should be getting back to Michigan at ridiculously late o’clock. I plan on giving myself at least a day to recover before trying to catch up on email or share pics and tales of Melbourne and all of that. Plus it will take me a little while to get used to standing on this side of the world after spending the past ten days upside down. So in the meantime, have a rerun from 2008.

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Yesterday was apparently the day for cover sketches. First up, sonyamsipes passed along the rough sketches for the CatsCurious Faery Taile Project covers. They’re not colored yet, but I like what I’ve seen. Sadly, I can’t share it yet, but I can direct you to the artist’s web gallery, which has some of her work. I did show the sketches to my three-year-old son, who immediately identified Red Riding Hood even though there’s no red. He’s a smart boy 🙂

And then later on, my editor at DAW e-mailed me the sketch for The Stepsister Scheme, asking what I thought.

Before I go any further, I should point out that both of these editors asked for feedback, and neither one was under any obligation to do so. The thing is, authors are good with words. We may or may not be good with visual art. Even if we are, our priorities tend to be different than the publishers’. We like everything to be perfect and exactly representative of our work. The publisher wants a cover that will impress the buyers at the chain stores, and will make readers pick up and buy the book.

Look at the cover of Goblin Quest [Amazon | Mysterious Galaxy]. At no time would Jig actually stand up to Straum the dragon like that. But the art does a great job of capturing the book’s feel, and it’s good enough to make people pick it up and look closer.

So I’m grateful to both of my editors for inviting me into this part of the process. That doesn’t always happen, and I try not to abuse their invitation by being a total jerk. For Stepsister, I put together four specific comments, at least one of which I suspect isn’t going to happen because it would be too major of a change. Each one was along the lines of, “I think this detail could be changed, and here are the reasons I think this is important.” My editor actually agreed with me on all of them, so I’m hopeful at least some of those changes will happen.

The artwork itself is fun, and captures a little of the Charlie’s Angels feel of the book. It’s certainly a different style than on the goblin books. The sketch, while unfinished, almost had an anime feel to it. Not what I had imagined, but I could see it working quite well, especially with how popular anime is these days. Danielle is my favorite by far. I had described her sword, which has a hazel-tree theme to the hilt, and the artist ran with that.

One of my favorite details — I talked to my editor about using a picture of my daughter as “inspiration” for Talia. She wasn’t sure, but said to go ahead and pass a pic along and we’d see what happened. The artist used the picture. It’s not my daughter, but if you’ve met her, you can see her in Talia. The book is going to be dedicated to her, and now she’ll (kind of) be on the cover as well. (I did ask her how she felt about this before talking to my editor. She said it was fine, but I think she got a little shy when she saw the sketch.)

I love this part of the process, actually seeing these characters as images rather than words on the page. It’s one step closer to being a real book! I can’t wait to see the finished covers, and to share them with you all.

June 11, 2014 /

Flashback: June 11, 2000

This is the oldest rerun I’ll be doing, from fourteen years ago. Roughly six months after I wrote that, I left Nevada and returned home to Michigan. Here’s a little background on the Warner Novel Contest mentioned below. (Spoiler: I didn’t win.) And while I did submit Foundling to various places, it ended up being one of my trunk novels.

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As a few people have noticed, I haven’t been posting much here lately.  Reasons?  Had a guest for a week, been working a lot when I can, and I hadn’t touched the novel in a long time.  Since this is supposed to be a writing journal, I was a bit embarrassed to post anything before I got back to writing.

But now I have.  I’ve re-revised the first two chapters of Foundling, and I’m hoping to have the first three ready to submit to the Warner Novel Contest by the 15th.  It’ll be tight, which is my own fault, but I still think I can do this.  (Whether I can then revise the rest of the novel in time to send it in, assuming they want to see it, is another question…)

In other happy news, my article “Build a Better Psychologist” came out in the last issue of Speculations.  And I saw that my story “Hasa Kesla” is scheduled for the very last issue of Marion Zimmer Bradley’s Fantasy Magazine.  Strange to think that I’ll be in the last issue of the magazine that sent me my first rejection letter.  But that should be out, probably in the next 6 to 8 months or so.  (Don’t worry, I’ll let everyone know 🙂

Aside from that, there’s not much to report.  But I think it can be safely assumed at this point that Elko, Nevada is not the ideal writing environment for me.  I had two story ideas within 24 hours of leaving for vacation last month, but not a one in the weeks since I got back.  One more reason to think about getting out of here….

June 10, 2014 /

Flashback: June 10, 2010

There’s a line in Unbound where a character gives Isaac a hard time about running toward the danger. Well, four years ago today, I was reading a news story about my brother and his wife, in which they did exactly that. Because they’re kind of awesome that way, and/or have no sense of self-preservation. Possibly both…

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This is my brother Brian.  If you’ve been to one of my Grand Rapids signings, you might recognize him.

The screenshot comes from a news story about a house in Grand Rapids that exploded at two in the morning on the 9th.  Brian and his wife Wendy live across the street.

Here’s the part of the story that gets me.  “Hines ran to the scene of the fire within a minute of hearing the explosion…”

He tried to kick in the front door.  When that failed, he and Wendy went around to find another way in.  They got another door cracked open, enough to see that the floor inside was gone and the flames were spreading far too fast, and they had to get out of there.

Two in the morning.  Within a minute, maybe two, he was across the street, yelling to one person to call 911 and trying to see if the man who lived there was still alive.  Because that’s just who he is.  It’s instinctive.

I can’t say I’m completely thrilled at the idea of them running toward the burning house.  I’m glad he and Wendy assessed the situation and got away when they realized there was no way to get inside, but still … the explosion shook the house off its foundation.  Not to mention the smoke, and how quickly fire can spread.

But when something like this happens — and this isn’t the first time he’s found himself in the middle of this kind of crisis — his first instinct is to help.  I think the world would be a much better place if we had more people like them.

So, yeah.  That’s my little brother.  He’s a good guy, and I’m proud of him.

ETA: Originally I left Wendy’s name out of this post, as she was not mentioned in the news story and I wasn’t sure how much they wanted shared.  I’ve updated the post based on my brother’s comment, “Jim, we appreciate your concern for our privacy immensely, but it’s okay, we both agreed privacy was kind of irrelevant at this point. Besides, equal contribution, equal credit. She’s awesome and went right through that door with me, no questions asked.”  So there you go.  My awesome brother and his equally awesome wife Wendy.

June 9, 2014 /

Flashback: June 9, 2003

Hello from Continuum! I’m currently out hunting drop-bears, so I’m rerunning some old blog posts. This one is from eleven years ago, back when I was hand-coding the HTML for every entry.

Both “Flying with Griffons” and “Grafted,” the two stories mentioned below, were rejected and eventually trunked. “Original Gangster,” on the other hand, ended up selling to Fantasy Magazine.

I never finished the sequel novel to Goldfish Dreams, either. To be honest, I had completely forgotten about that…

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6/9/03: “A Few Happy Thoughts”

Working on: Goldfish Dreams II
Progress: 1759 Words (11,014 Total)

To help me start my morning in a happy mood, I found an e-mail from Usborne Fantasy saying “Flying with Griffons” had been passed along to the editor.  I should know within another month if it’s good enough to make the cut.  I hope so…not just because it would be a sale, but because I get warm fuzzies from writing stories for children, and I think this was a pretty darn good one.  I also sent “Grafted” off to Wicked Hollow, leaving just four other stories to find homes for.  I may retire “Preacher Man” for now, and I’ve got one that needs revision, but I really need to get off my butt and get those other two back out.  Bad writer!

I’m giving serious thought to sending “Original Gangster” to Black Gate.  It’s a great market, and OG has some decent action/adventure to it.  Only I’ve got 2 stories sitting at Black Gate already, and with the 8-12 month turnaround there, I don’t really feel like sending a 3rd story.  But anywhere else I send it would be a second-tier market (in Jim’s totally arbitrary mental list of places to send stories, that is).

Ooh – and look, Half.com has a few new copies of Goldfish Dreams listed that come in below retail, even with shipping!  Isn’t it nice when booksellers all compete 🙂  And if I do this right and you follow this link, you might even be able to get an extra $5 off.  (Looks like that applies to new Half.com customers only, though.)  Ooh…it’s at Walmart, too!  This is cool!

Another long day – back to ADA after work today.  But I’m hoping to get some writing done during lunch.  I just need to decide whether to work on the new book, on the superhero story, on publicity materials for GD, or any of the stories sitting around needing to be revised.

June 6, 2014 /

Flashback: June 6, 2009

If all went well, I’m at Continuum doing con-stuff today. In all likelihood, I’m either having a blast, or else I’m freaking out because how the heck am I going to follow up the Guest of Honor speech N. K. Jemisin gave last year???

In the meantime, I’ve been posting reruns from the blog. Today’s post is five years old, but I’d probably give pretty much the same advice etoday…

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Okay, “wisdom” might be an overstatement.  But at Penguicon this year, it occurred to me that I’ve been doing writing workshops for a long time.  As a participant, I’ve done creative writing class discussions, the Writers of the Future workshop in ‘99, Critters, and then several years with a local group until they dissolved.  Eventually, I started cofacilitating workshops, helping to run them at ConFusion, ConClave, and now Penguicon, among others.

That’s a lot of fiction feedback, and after a while, you start to notice patterns.  I figured it might be helpful to list some of the more common feedback I’ve given and received over the years.  Like all “rules,” some of these can be bent.  Others can be broken.  Our job is to learn them well enough to know when and how.

Begin at the beginning.  I don’t know how many times I’ve read a story, and it takes several pages or chapters before things start moving.  As a writer, my first drafts often include a lot of brainstorming at the beginning.  I’m laying down backstory, trying to figure everything out, but the story doesn’t get moving until later.  As a general rule, your story doesn’t start with your hero getting up, making breakfast, and brushing his teeth.  It starts with the werejaguar that carjacks him on the way to work.

Your protagonist must protag.  Your protagonist wants something.  The story is about how she tries to accomplish that goal, struggling and eventually failing or succeeding.  If your protagonist sits around, passively describing what’s happening while never taking part in the action, you might want to consider either making her an active participant in her own story or else switching to another protagonist.

Who are you? Why am I against this wall? Why won’t my arms move? Where’s Buttercup?  It’s one thing to toss your readers into a scene, but you also need to orient them.  Where are we, and why should readers care?  I’ve learned that at the start of any scene, chapter, or story, I need to answer most or all of the following questions: Who is the POV character?  Who else is here?  Where are we?  How much time has passed since the last scene?  What’s going on?

Meet the twins, Bweryang and Bob.  Names are important.  Make sure yours are culturally consistent.  Unless you’re deliberately going for humor, your ogres named Grok, Flargh, and Kandi are going to throw me right out of the story.  Also make sure your names aren’t going to resonate with other culturally popular names.  Your story about OB/GYN medical droids where the head ‘bot is named O.B.1?  Yeah, that’s not gonna work.

The mysterious man and his mysterious quest.  As authors, we want to build suspense.  What better way than by keeping secrets from the reader?  Hide everyone’s horrible pasts, their true motivations, even their names!  You’d be amazed how many workshop stories don’t give the character’s name until well into the tale.  The problem is, it’s hard to care about someone we know nothing about (not to mention the convolutions the writer had to go through to keep things hidden).  I still find myself hiding too much in my early drafts.  But the more I share, the more the reader can empathize and get invested in the story.

I think I took a wrong turn at Albuquerque.  A lot of early drafts meander, until the reader starts to wonder if the author knows where the story’s going.  One character is on a quest to rescue his cat, but then it turns into a story about the veterinarian, and suddenly we’re preaching about animal rights, and in the end the vet’s kid wrecks the truck.  Lots of action, but totally disconnected.  For me, what’s helped is to boil each book, story, chapter, or scene into a single sentence to help me focus.

A certain point of view?  I’d say at least half the workshop stories I read have point of view trouble.  Sometimes it’s minor.  We’re in third person limited PoV, staying strictly within the mind of our protagonist, and then there’s a paragraph that tells us what some random character is thinking.  Other times it’s messier, jumping from one person’s head to another with no rhyme or reason, and no indication of when or why we’ve switched perspectives.

Prologues.  Prologues are not a requirement of fantasy novels.  The fantasy police will not break down your door and taser you if you fail to include one.  If you do decide to use a prologue, know why.  What does the prologue accomplish that you couldn’t do with a regular old chapter?  I’d say less than 20% of the prologues I read in workshops really help the stories.  Is this the most effective way to give your readers whatever info you want them to have?  If you want to give the full history of your world, great.  But you might be better off waiting until it’s relevant to the story rather than opening with 8 pages of infodumping.  (See also Begin at the beginning.)


That’s what I was able to come up with off the top of my head.  I hope it’s helpful.  I’m sure there are more, and I’m happy to hear other tidbits from folks.

June 5, 2014 /

Flashback: June 5, 2006

Ah, June 5, 2006. I remember it like it was exactly eight years ago.

This was the day I wrote the very first line of Goblin War [Amazon | B&N | Mysterious Galaxy]. A historic day, one which should be remembered and celebrated for centuries to come!

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At this point, I’m waiting on a few story critiques, as well as comments on Goblin Hero from my editor. So I figured, what better way to hurry things along than to start something else? That way I’m sure to get an interruption soon 😉

So today, I wrote the first line of Goblin War. Then I wrote some other lines, but that didn’t feel as significant. Something about putting down those first few words … I’m really doing it. I’m really starting another novel. There it is, with Jig’s name and everything.

I also did a bit more brainstorming about a problem. See, in Goblin Quest, the goal is a big powerful toy with enough magic to make a man (or a goblin) pretty dang powerful. But once such a toy exists, it’s a part of your world, and you have to consider it when you’re writing further stories. Big, scary bad guy? Use the toy and blip them out of existence. Suddenly your big, challenging novel becomes a one-page short-short.

In book two, there’s a logical reason why this toy can’t be used. It’s a slight stretch, but it works. I may have to make it more clear, I don’t know … we’ll see what the editor says.

Not so for book three. My whole plot outline was set up by ignoring that magical toy, and that’s cheating. Star Trek used to do that … Kirk and Spock steal a cloaking device, but never bother to use it. They build a nifty new engineering toy, then forget about it in the next episode. That’s just dumb.

But then today I figured out how to take it out of the equation. It’s not cheating, and in fact it’s perfectly consistent with the various characters and their motivations. Plus it’ll be funny. So that’s a bit of a relief.

And to celebrate, I give you the first line of Goblin War. (Which may change when I come back and rewrite, but that’s okay.)

Goblin war drums wouldn’t be so bad, Jig decided, if the drummers could only stick to a consistent beat.

June 4, 2014 /

Flashback: June 4, 2007

Greetings from limbo! I’m currently en route to Continuum, but given the weirdness of time zones and the international date line, I have no idea where or when I’ll actually be when this post goes up. In fact, depending on the flight, it’s possible that I might never see June 4, 2014 at 9:30 a.m.!

In the meantime, have another post from the archives. Back in 2007, I had just begun doing LOLBooks, adding captions to various book covers and artwork…

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For anyone who missed the earlier of my book-macroing entries, you can go to http://jimhines.livejournal.com/tag/lol to see all of them.

And if you find these entries completely bizarre and confusing, I Can Haz Cheezburger should provide some background.

Anyway, today I present Tobias Buckell’s debut novel, the Nebula finalist and Locus bestseller Crystal Rain. (Art by Todd Lockwood.)

So what do folks think? Should I see how long I can ride this fad before running out of ideas? Or is it time to let the LOLing die already?

June 3, 2014 /

Flashback: June 3, 2005

I’m off to Melbourne for Continuum! Since I’ll be busy battling venomous were-kangaroos for the next week or so, I figured I’d run a few flashbacks from the blog.

On this date back in 2005, I was in the middle of drafting Goblin Hero [Amazon | B&N | Mysterious Galaxy], and decided to share an excerpt…

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This one’s free for all, since it’s another piece that will never make it into the final book. Enjoy!

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Jig pressed his body to the wall and knelt in the snow to confirm his fears.

“That’s not fair.” Jig closed his eyes. “There were only four pixies!” he shouted. “I counted them myself! Four, not forty! You stupid author, why do you keep doing this to us?”

Braf winced. Even Slash looked nervous. “Not so loud, Jig. The pixies-“

Jig shook his head. “I’m talking to the author. Secondary characters never seem to notice when I break the fourth wall.”

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  • How Isaac Met Smudge at Literary Escapism
  • Gift of the Kites at Clarkesworld
  • Original Gangster at Fantasy Magazine
  • Goblin Lullaby (audio) at PodCastle
  • Spell of the Sparrow (audio) at PodCastle

Banner artwork by Katy Shuttleworth.



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Jim C. Hines