I Hate This Part

IBARW link: rawles talking about Uhura.  “…please consider the point of view from which you are approaching your analysis because experiences vary wildly and one size does not fit all.”  I was troubled by the way Uhura/Spock was presented in the movie.  I don’t know that I agree with 100% of what rawles says here, but she’s given me a great deal to think about, including the perspective and assumptions behind my reactions to that coupling.


I love writing and being a writer (not always the same things).  It still blows my mind sometimes that I’m actually doing this.  That people walk into bookstores and (sometimes) see my stuff on the shelves.  That editors from the Czech Republic e-mail me to ask if they can reprint one of my stories (Ours to Fight For – yay!)  That I get fan mail, for crying out loud!  That’s crazy and wonderful and a little mind-blowing.

Then you have days like yesterday and today, where I’m 85% through the book and hit a brick wall of What-Was-I-Thinking?  The ending just doesn’t work.

I don’t expect plotting to be easy, but I hate what this part does to me.  For 24 hours now, I’ve been stuck.  I’m distracted, trying to fix the ending.  I’m impatient.  I’m cranky and stressed and ticked off at the damn story, and at myself for not catching this earlier.  I can’t imagine I was the most pleasant father/husband to be around last night.

I know I’ll get past this eventually.  I’ve figured out how to fix about half of what I need to.  The rest will come.  But right now, I also know I would be a happier, less stressed person if I wasn’t a writer.

I wouldn’t give it up, and I know it’s not a permanent state, but it’s still frustrating.  I love writing.  I hate when the negative takes over my life like this.  The only comfort is knowing this will vanish the instant I figure out the rest of this plot knot.

And now, back to the brainstorming.  Maybe if I had Red Riding Hood turn out to be a Terminator…