Friday is thinking about boycotting Monday.
So a handful of trolls decided to start a Boycott Star Wars VII hashtag on Twitter, claiming that the movie erases white male heroes and promotes white genocide and whatever. Star Wars: Aftermath author Chuck Wendig talks about it a bit here. The Mary Sue weighs in here. There’s been plenty of mockery, as well as folks pointing out some of the obvious irony. (Y’all know the most iconic figure in the franchise was voiced by a black man, right?)
There’s also folks pointing out that this was nothing but trolls begging for attention, and that the internet fell for it. Ah, internet. So gullible!
I read some of the 4chan board so you don’t have to. I can’t read minds, but yeah, there’s a good chance folks were stirring shit for attention and LOLs. But here’s the thing. You know Clarke’s Law? The one that says any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic? Well…
Any sufficiently hateful trolling is indistinguishable from bigotry.
The same folks crowing about how they suckered those stupid SJWs into reacting are also going on about how the black protagonist in The Force Awakens looks like a gorilla, how they can’t reshoot the film just because the protagonist is a n****r, and worse. Are these people trying to be ironically racist, or are they just bigoted assholes?
As it turns out, I don’t actually give a shit. Whether they truly believe a more diverse cast in Star Wars = promoting white genocide, that’s the message they’ve chosen to spread, and whatever the original intent, that message has attracted others. It’s become a magnet for spreading racism and antisemitism and hate.
If you punch me in the face, do you think I care whether or not you were doing it “ironically”?
If you truly believe that casting a black man and a white woman as leads in a Star Wars movie should be equated to genocide, you’re a racist asshole. But if you believe stirring up talk of boycotting Star Wars because they cast a black man and a white woman is a good way to get attention? You’re also a racist asshole.
Go ahead, please boycott the new Star Wars movie. I find I enjoy my movies more when there are fewer whiny, bigoted assholes in the theater. Better boycott Star Trek as well. I mean, you wouldn’t want to catch any of those icky “Infinite Diversity in Infinite Combinations” cooties. Boycott Marvel, where they’ve introduced a black Captain America and a black/Latino Spider-Man and an Asian-American Hulk. Boycott Legend of Korra and their non-white, non-straight heroines. Boycott video games for including transgender characters and nonwhite characters and more. As the push for diversity and inclusion continues to grow, you might want to boycott the whole damn field of science fiction and fantasy.
So either grow the hell up and stop fighting a losing battle to build a wall around the genre, or else boycott yourself right out of fandom, and let the rest of us enjoy a community with a few less bigoted assholes.
You can even boycott “ironically,” if that’s what it takes to get you to leave.
I’m back from toastmastering in ICON 40 in Iowa.
Shut up, spellcheck. Toastmastering is totally a word!
Anyway, it was a fabulous weekend, as always. The concom and the rest of the volunteers did an excellent job. My thanks, as always, to everyone who spent the past year working to make this happen. My only real complaint was that United cancelled my flight back home, meaning I ended up having to spend a half hour on the phone and then leave the con earlier on Sunday than I intended. My apologies for missing my last panel and closing ceremonies.
I took a bunch of pictures, because that’s what I do. Those went up on Facebook yesterday, and Flickr today.
Things started with a group booksigning event at the Cedar Rapids Barnes & Noble. That’s one brave bookstore, willingly taking so many feral authors into their midst, but it went well, and they now have plenty of signed Jim C. Hines books! Plus some books from some other author types, if you’re not into that Hines fellow’s stuff.
The next day, a group of us took a morning field trip to Riverside, Iowa, which is famous for being the future birthplace of one James Tiberius Kirk. As soon as we got there, a guy on the street looked at us and said, “The place you’re looking for is up one block and to the right.”
There was also a little Star Trek and Riverside History museum, which included a woodcut statue of Captain Kirk, lots of autographed photos, costumes and models, and a collection of Trek tie-in novels. (They opened up that display so Joe Haldeman could autograph his.)
Then it was back to the hotel for Dreamcon (an afternoon workshop with some local high school students), panels, and opening ceremonies. I had notes for how I wanted to introduce each of our guests of honor. For Ann Leckie, I would talk about her work and all of the awards she’d won, and then mention that her latest book, Ancillary Mercy, had just come out. I planned to joke that this one hadn’t earned any honors yet, but hey, the weekend was still young!
Well, before we could even get to opening ceremonies, the news broke that Ann and her book had made the NYT Bestseller list! Geez, Ann. Could you at least let me get through my introduction first? (Also, congratulations again!!!)
Opening ceremonies also saw the tribble incident, wherein we dumped a crate full of tribbles onto tribble-master David Gerrold…who then proceeded to tuck one into the waist of my pants. Ann dubbed it the Trouser Tribble. TT came home with me and now enjoys a place of honor on the shelf of trophies and memorabilia. (It also took a brief detour on the TARDIS.)
The rest of the weekend is a blur. I got to chat a bit with artist guest Sarah Clemens, though I sadly wasn’t able to make it to her theremin demonstration. I photographed several of costuming guest Kalli McCandless‘ awesome costumes. I caught up with lots of wonderful people, sat in a Delorean, ate too much food, and soon found myself wondering how the heck it could be Sunday afternoon already.
One of the most awesome moments was seeing Pamela Orth Webster show up at my reading, cosplaying as Danielle from The Stepsister Scheme. It was amazing and perfect and made my whole weekend!
Special shoutout to Terri LeBlanc, who was the liaison from heaven, making sure I had food and getting me wherever I needed to go.
Feel free to check out Flickr for the rest of the pictures. As for me, I’m still in recovery mode, trying to readjust to the real world after a great weekend. All I know is that I’m very much looking forward to ICON 41 next year. As toastmaster, I’ll get to introduce Seanan McGuire. That should be entertaining 🙂
Friday is posting from a totally different time zone. (It’s all wibbly-wobbly and stuff.)
Tomorrow I fly out to Cedar Rapids, Iowa, where I once again have the honor of being Toastmaster for ICON. That means I get to introduce and interview our guests of honor, including David Gerrold, Sarah Clemens, Ann Leckie, Kalli McCandless, and honorary ICON parents Joe and Gay Haldeman. It’s a pretty sweet gig 🙂
If you’ll be in the area and able to attend, here’s where to find me. Or how to avoid me, if you prefer. Programming information is also available on the ICON website.
Thursday
Friday
Saturday
Sunday
Looking forward to seeing people and having a fun — and very busy — weekend!
I’ve been asked on multiple occasions how to balance writing and family, and I’ve given a number of answers. “One day at a time.” “Prioritize and organize and schedule.” “Hell if I know!”
When you get down to it, the most honest answer I could give based on my life and experiences is, you can’t. Balance is a lie. An illusion that taunts us with its song. It’s freaking Shangri-La.
As a father, balance suggests to me a mystical state of equilibrium where I’m giving my children all of the time and attention they want and need, while at the same time devoting enough time to my writing and career. The trouble is, there’s no such thing as “enough.” There’s always more I could be doing with or for my kids, whether it’s quizzing my son on his multiplication tables or taking my teenage daughter out to start showing her how to drive, or just sitting down to play a three-way brawl on the Wii.
Then there’s the writing. I’ve got three short stories and three novels on my To Write list at this particular moment. Then there are the blog posts, the emails I’m chronically late in responding to, conventions I’d love to attend, anthologies I’d like to contribute to, at least one anthology I’d love to edit, and so much more.
The sad truth is that no matter what I do, I’ll never have enough time to write everything I want to. I’ll never have enough time for my children.
I quit my full-time day job a month and a half ago, and it’s helped some. I’m finding my writing groove and increasing my wordcount. I’ve also been able to do things like walk down to meet my son at the bus stop and pick up my daughter after school. On the other hand, I’m now the one who gets the phone call when something happens at school. I get the text messages when someone misses the bus. When the puppy horks up a big clump of half-digested grass — well, you get the idea. There are more interruptions and less stability and predictability in my day than I had before.
Just now, in the middle of writing this post, my son interrupted me to share some of his thoughts on pigs. It’s frustrating, because writing productivity is all about momentum. And it’s awesome, because I love him, and he has creative, often surreal thoughts about things.
Sometimes I resent the writing for taking time away from my kids. And yes, sometimes I resent my kids for taking time away from my writing. And I feel guilty about all of it.
Writing isn’t unique in this. I watched my coworkers struggling to find good day care for their kids, and I listened to their struggles to balance the need for a career with their role as a parent. But it never seemed quite the same. Maybe because writing still doesn’t feel like a legitimate career. I mean, we all recognize the need to work and support the family, but we don’t tend to recognize writing as real work.
I’m relatively successful as a writer, and it’s my primary source of income to help support my family. It still feels harder to justify spending hours focusing on the writing than it did spending hours sitting in a cubicle. Both take time away from my family and kids, but one is a “real” job. The other feels like a luxury. It feels selfish. This is something I want to do.
The guilt was exponentially worse when I was struggling to break in. When I couldn’t point to advances and royalty checks to justify the time spent in fictional worlds, away from my wife and children.
Part of the quest for healthy balance means getting that guilt under control. As parents, we can’t devote 100% of our time and energy to our children. Sometimes it feels like that’s what we’re supposed to to, but it’s not healthy for anyone. We need time to take care of ourselves, and as they grow up, kids need time to become their own people. It’s okay to take time to focus on writing. And it’s okay to step away from the computer to spend time with my family.
The Quest for Balance has no end point. No Big Boss you can defeat. It’s a daily struggle, and it changes from day to day. Do I have a deadline coming up? Did my son have a rough day at school? Is there a writing project I’m super-passionate about? How long has it been since I got to do something fun with my daughter? Is my email at critical mass? Is my son giving me puppy-dog eyes and asking me to play Mario with him?
How do you balance being a writer with being a parent? You keep trying. You accept that you’re never going to get it perfect. You listen to your kid(s), your editor, your partner(s) if you have them. You listen to yourself. You communicate. Sometimes I have to say no, I can’t play Mario until after dinner. When I talk to my editor and agent about deadlines, I talk about and factor in not only the time I need to write the book, but the time I need to spend with my family.
Balance is a process. Learn to set boundaries. Expect disruption.
In my case, I keep reminding myself that writing is my career, and damn right it’s legitimate. I remind myself that taking time to do something I love isn’t necessarily selfish or awful. I also try to recognize that spending too much time on myself can be neglectful, and I try to monitor that from day to day.
I love my children. I love writing. And it’s okay to love both.
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Other posts from the Parenting and Writing/Editing Blog Tour.
Remember on Monday when I said I’d be doing a cover pose if Read for Pixels raised at least $10,000 in their current fundraiser to end violence against women?
Remember how I said there was a bonus announcement coming soon?
Well, SOON IS NOW!!!
We’re at almost $6000 so far, with 10 days left in the fundraiser. Having seen the potential poses, I have to admit there’s a small part of me (my spine, mostly) that hopes we don’t make it to $10K…
…but then we’d never be able to reach $15K, at which point New York Times bestselling author Chuck Wendig will join me in an epic pose-off, the likes of which the world hasn’t seen since at least 2012!!!
That’s right, not only will I do another pose at the $15K mark, but I’ll drag Chuck along with me.
To jog your memory, here’s what happened back in 2012, when I challenged John Scalzi to a pose-off:
We have ten days to raise roughly $9000, at which point we shall bless the internet with the first-ever Wendig-style cover pose pic!
Friday is thinking about trying NaNoWriMo this year.
I quit my full-time day job just over a month ago. By now, thanks to all that newfound time, you might expect I’d have finished up three books, eleven short stories, written a spec script for Doctor Who, and branched out into goblin romance novels under a pseudonym. But apparently it doesn’t work that way…
Author Leah Cypess has been doing this Writing While Parenting thing a lot longer than I have, and has come along just in time to share some of her insights and lessons on trying to balance it all and make the most of that time.
Leah has two series, the most recent of which begins with the YA fantasy Death Sworn. Booklist compared her protagonist to Tamora Pierce’s Alanna and George R.R. Martin’s Arya Stark, which is pretty cool praise if you ask me.
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Posts about balancing writing and kids usually intimidate me. Other people are getting up at 5 a.m. to write or actually getting their kids to leave them alone when they want to work. These people have figured it out, and I clearly have not.
(Case in point: I originally told Jim I would send him this post in late August, exactly the time when my kids have no camp and no school. I think the takeaway from that is obvious.)
With that said, I have 4 kids and 4 published books, and in the process of producing all 8 of these, I’ve gained a sense of what works for me and what doesn’t. I don’t have a “method,” but I do have a set of principles that I’ve learned to ignore at my peril.
They may or may not work for you; but for those who will find them useful, here they are:
[1] Write first. I cannot stress this one enough. Raising kids involves a million mindless tasks, ranging from necessary to bizarre, that can keep you occupied every waking minute. Don’t waste your alert mind on those tasks. I try to get an hour of writing done every morning, as soon as possible after the 3 older kids are in school, before the endless tasks list can take over my attention. That is almost always the most productive hour of my day.
[2] Go outside. There are times when it is really tempting to skip this one. My husband got the older kids out the door, the baby is still sleeping, and I just woke up with an epiphany about exactly what need to happen next in my book and how it’s going to be the coolest plot twist ever. I’m wearing really comfortable pajamas and there are no distractions on the horizon. Obviously, all I need to do is open my laptop and write five thousand words. No, seven thousand! Ten thousand! This will be my most productive day in months!
Right. Half an hour later, I realize the plot twist doesn’t actually make any sense, and I need to pause and think it over. I check my email, an hour later, I check facebook, and next thing I know my kids are coming home from school and I’ve written five paragraphs and eaten half a box of chocolate peanut butter cups. Okay, maybe not as bad as that, but there is something about staying home in my pajamas that drains my willpower and creative energy.
[3] Don’t take on extra commitments without thinking about them carefully. (See first paragraph above.) But DO take on some commitments, even those that don’t seem to make perfect sense on a time-for-money basis. Every time I agree to do a bookstore visit, I end up regretting it the day before — because I have to drive so far! and find a babysitter! and it’s taking up so much of my time! — but my regret is almost always gone by the time the event is over. There’s nothing like hanging out with other writers and meeting fans of your books to remind yourself why you wanted to do this in the first place. Just try to schedule your commitments realistically; everything you do eats into your writing and childcare time, so make your decisions with open eyes. (Maureen Johnson wrote a blog post I find myself re-reading often, to help myself stick to this.)
[4] Your kids need to occupy themselves. Not all the time, but some of the time. You don’t actually need to be actively engaged with them every second. (An especially important message for women, since society sometimes sends the message that any time a mother is not fully focused on her kids, she is being selfish.) You can help by taking them places where it is easy for them to entertain themselves. For younger kids, playgrounds are awesome — free, always open, and with convenient benches for sitting and writing. For older kids, playdates are usually the answer. Another huge help is reading: if you can get your kid interested in reading, then aside from all the obvious benefits to them, you can sit next to them while they read, and you can write, and everyone is happy.
That’s what works for me … most of the time, anyhow. What works for someone else may be entirely different. Heck, what works for me in four years may be entirely different. But for now, this is keeping my own balancing act going; and maybe some aspects of it will be helpful for yours.
Laura Anne Gilman‘s new fantasy novel Silver on the Road [Amazon | B&N | IndieBound] came out today. But I got to read it last month, because of Author Perks! I love my job 🙂
This is actually the third weird western fantasy I’ve read this year. (The others were Elizabeth Bear’s Karen Memory and Lila Bowen’s Wake of Vultures, which I provided a blurb for.) Gilman’s book made a three-book streak of good, fun, engaging storytelling.
Here’s an abridged version of the publisher’s summary:
Isobel  is a child of the Territory.  She grew up in a saloon, trained to serve drinks and fold laundry, to observe the players at the card tables and report back to her boss on what she saw. But when she comes of age, she is given a choice….
Isobel chooses power. Â Chooses risk. Chooses to throw her cards in with the Devil, Master of the Territory.
But the costs of that power are greater than she ever imagined; the things she must do, the person she must become…  And she needs to learn her new role quickly: pressures from both outside the Territory and within are growing, and the Devil’s Hand has work to do…
Izzy’s job as the Devil’s Left Hand is to travel the Territory, and to discover and resolve problems. Problems like an entire town killed by what may or may not be plague; like families slaughtered; like demons and wandering magicians, both of which can be equally deadly.
The Devil hasn’t had a Left Hand in a long time, but he knows something’s stirring. He makes a separate Bargain with a rider named Gabriel, who agrees to mentor Izzy and teach her the ways of the Road. Gabriel is older and experienced, but Izzy’s the one with the responsibility and the power. If she can learn how to use it.
I loved the worldbuilding in this story. I love that the Devil both is and isn’t the figure you’re used to. In some respects, particularly the Bargains he makes, he’s very familiar … and then you realize “Devil” is just a name, and you never truly learn what he really is. There’s power and mystery there. Is he evil? He seems to be scrupulously fair in honoring the Laws and Bargains of the Territory. I’m hoping to see and learn more about him in future books.
Then there are things like the danger of the crossroads, the power of silver to cleanse evil magic, the snakes that show up in the night to whisper cryptic warnings, the alternate history of the American frontier, with various nations fighting to control the land beyond the Territory the Devil has claimed as his own.
I also appreciated the relationship between Izzy and Gabriel. Izzy is only sixteen, and Gabriel is older and rougher around the edges. It’s not set up as a romance. Instead, we start with Gabriel as teacher and evolve first into a partnership, and eventually into Izzy stepping into her role as Hand and taking the lead in making decisions and facing the darkness.
I won’t spoil the ending, but I will say I really appreciated the way Gilman resolved things. It’s not necessarily what you’d expect, but it felt right for Izzy’s character, the story, and the world.
Also, the magician they meet is such a fun character.
I look forward to the next book in the series!
You can read a sample on Gilman’s website.
