 [Amazon | B&N | Mysterious Galaxy] |
Quick Thanks: My Fantasy Poses post has now been viewed well over 100,000 times, which is awesome. But I’ve noticed that as this continues to spread, I’m seeing a larger number of comments that … well, let’s just say I sometimes take for granted the mostly thoughtful, respectful, and fun comments and discussions from people here on the blog. Glancing at these other sites has been a reminder to 1) STOP READING COMMENTS ON UNMODERATED SITES! and 2) thank everyone here for being generally excellent people. # It always feels weird to talk about money. Partly this is because we’re taught not to do so. It also feels uncomfortably like boasting. I know a lot of people are struggling right now, and the last thing I want to do is rub their noses in the fact that I had a good year. At the same time, there are so many misconceptions about writers and how much they make… I continue to run into people who assume I’m rich because I’ve got some books out, people who expect me to live in a mansion with solid gold robokittens and nuclear powered toothbrushes and so on. And I think it’s important to bust some of the myths about writing and writers. I’ll put this behind a cut tag. If you’re interested, then read on… Despite the post-con neuroses, I had a great time at ConFusion last weekend. I’ve been going to conventions for about a decade, and this was one of my favorites. Being Toastmaster for the first time was a blast, if a little exhausting. The whole weekend was well-organized, the hotel space works great, and there were so many wonderful people that even though I went up a day early, there was no way to spend as much time as I wanted with everyone. I apologize for everyone and everything I’m about to forget, but here’s my highlights reel for the weekend… Author D&D: Friday afternoon, I joined Brent Weeks, Joe Abercrombie, Pat Rothfuss, Jay Lake/Scott Lynch, Yanni Kuznia/Elizabeth Bear, and Peter Brett for an old-school, first edition adventure through the Keep on the Borderlands. Myke Cole and Saladin Ahmed kindly DMed the adventure. Favorite moment: too many to count … there was me attacking an old man with half a jaguar, Brent Weeks and Joe Abercrombie’s ongoing thief vs. assassin bit (with kissing!), Pat’s fawning manservant … author D&D should be a regular part of all cons from now on! My least favorite moment: almost getting killed by goblins. Ah, the irony. Here’s my badly-stitched wide-view shot of the game. Pete is blurry because he has an extra-high DEX. (There are write-ups of the game from Myke and Brent.)
I Suck: Last year, I proposed a panel in which various authors would talk about … well, you get the idea. I wasn’t sure how this would go over, but we packed the room. John Scalzi, Scott Lynch, Pat Rothfuss, Joe Abercrombie and I talked about our own weaknesses, the joy of one-star reviews, and much more. It was tremendous fun.
Rocky Horror Muppet Show: This is the brainchild of Tom Smith. Imagine the Muppets trying to do Rocky Horror. Yeah… This was, if I’m remembering correctly, only the third time in history the show has been performed. I was invited to be a special guest star. Unfortunately, I missed rehearsal due to scheduling conflicts. So I got a copy of the script, showed up about 20 minutes early with a few questions, and winged that sucker. It was tremendous fun. Tom makes an awesome Kermit, Scooter was a blast, Gonzo had her own knitted (crocheted?) nose … the whole cast was obviously enjoying themselves, and I’m very happy I could play a part. There was one spot where I was supposed to sing, and I cheated by going full Shatner on that verse, which seemed to work. I hear rumors there may eventually be a YouTube video of the performance. I’ll link to it when it goes live. Maybe. The People: Holy dung, ConFusion had a lot of guests this year! Eight guests of honor (not including myself), and an epic list of authors. I won’t even try to name everyone I got to talk to and hang out with, and if the con had lasted a month, I still don’t think I would have had enough time. I love my geek peeps, and I miss you all! Except Scott Lynch. I’m onto you, man…
Miscellaneous: Yeah, a lot of people have seen those fantasy pose pics I posted. I’ve been told I should do a calendar. (I’m thinking about it.) I did a kaffeeklatch which went well. I talked about Libriomancer, and lots of people are excited about the new book, which pleases me to no end. I did a joint reading with Kristine Smith. (Our stories are both coming out in March in The Modern Fey’s Guide to Surviving Humanity.) I did not make it to Saladin Ahmed’s new book party, and from everything I’ve heard, that’s my loss. My friend M’jit brought me Disney princess Kleenex. Big B. made me an Program Book Note: Seanan McGuire was kind enough to write a wonderful song for my bio in the program book. Unfortunately, her name was omitted when the book went to the printer. So please check that out (page 10), and know it came from the epic mind of McGuire. In Conclusion: A great con, and I will most definitely be back next year, when the guests include Charlie Stross, Scott Edelman, and Mary Robinette Kowal. Baby Got Books (Intro) I like big books and I cannot lie. No time for writers I’m tired of magazines, Readers (yeah), readers (yeah) (Bulging shelves with the epic plotlines) I like ’em thick and dense. I wanna read Durham, So bookstores (yeah), bookstores (yeah), (Bulging shelves with the epic plotlines.) Yeah baby So you only read the Cliff Notes, A while back, I did a comic called Writing: A Reality Check. I figured it was time for another follow-up, this one about the dreams vs. the reality of having a new book come out… Enjoy!
I’ve always liked this particular quote, but as I struggle with Libriomancer, I decided it didn’t go far enough.
LiveJournal has been hit by repeated DDoS attacks lately, which has been incredibly frustrating. I’m not leaving LJ - I’m not about to give the hackers the satisfaction. That said, for those who might be missing their daily fix of Jim-babble, my blog is hosted on my site, complete with an RSS feed, and is also mirrored at Dreamwidth. But I’m a-staying on LJ, too. # Folks have now donated more than $600 in the Fundraiser for Rape Crisis Centers! Go us! So in addition to an ARC of The Snow Queen’s Shadow, I’ll be picking another winner to receive an autographed copy of Goblin Tales. Any suggestions for a third prize if we reach $1000 in donations? # From an e-mail exchange with Pat Rothfuss. Jim: At ConFusion next year, I plan to eat your heart and claim your authorly power for myself. I just thought it polite to give you a heads-up. Pat: Ha! You fool! I keep my power in my pancreas! Nobody ever eats that… Jim: Dude, I’m diabetic. Stealing your fully-functional pancreas would be a double-win for me! So when you come to ConFusion next year where I’m toastmaster and Pat is GoH, if you see me happily dining on pancreas, now you know why. # Finally, from the Department of Unexpectedly Awesome, I present LEGO + McDonalds + Podracing, created by GeekyTom. Only one picture, but worth clicking the pic for a close-up.
Goblin Tales [Amazon | B&N | Lulu] picked up reviews at SciFiChick (“This must-read collection…”) and Romantic Times (“…a fabulous introduction to Hines’ writing, his world of goblins, and his world of Libriomancy all in one — who can pass up a 3-fer?”) # A month or so back, I was invited to write a guest blog post for the Organization for Transformative Works. Here’s a sneak peek: I’ve seen the whole spectrum of opinions, from “Fanfiction is the Devil’s Prose!” to “Fanfiction is so much better than that commercial dreck.” I don’t buy either view. Fanfiction is fanfiction. Some is brilliant. Some is abysmal. Fanfic authors sometimes get criticized for not writing commercially, but that makes as little sense as criticizing a fantasy author for not writing fortune cookies. For most of us, we write what we love, and we do it because we love it. Full post is here. # Finally, does anyone else remember M.A.S.K., an 80s cartoon and toy line about vehicles and buildings with hidden weapons, concealed mini-vehicles, and also lots of masks? Orion Pax (the same individual who built a transforming Optimus Prime from LEGO) has been working on LEGO M.A.S.K., including a working version of Boulder Hill, the good guys’ HQ. We had these toys! I remember playing with this set. This blows my mind. Click here or the thumbnails for the full photo set.
Interviewers often ask me who I’d cast if there were to be a movie of The Stepsister Scheme [Amazon | B&N | Mysterious Galaxy] and the subsequent books. I don’t get out to see many movies, so I usually try to brush that question off. But then on Twitter, I came across a reference to a new project from Felicia Day, and it occurred to me that she could do a very nice job of playing Danielle. A few Tweets later, and we have: Danielle: Felicia Day And maybe Wil Wheaton for Diglet the goblin? I know it’s a smaller part, but I could see him having lots of fun with that. Dear Hollywood - please make it so. What do you think? Any ideas for the rest of the cast? Queen Bea, Prince Armand, Hephyra (from books two and four, because of course we’re going to do all four films), Roudette, Trittibar, etc? —-
Normally, I’d run a First Book Friday post here. Alas, I didn’t have one ready. I’ve got several invitations out, but since I’m not paying for these posts, I don’t feel right setting deadlines or pressuring people who are already taking the time to write something for us. So then I was going to do a First Book Friday roundup with links back to all the posts. (The clip show of blogging.) But then I had another idea. Since the Writing Reality Check comic was the most popular post I’ve done in months, why not do another comic? And I knew just the message I wanted to get across.
(Yeah, I don’t think Randall Munroe has anything to fear from me.) |
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Copyright © 2012 Jim C. Hines - All Rights Reserved |
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Opening Ceremonies: Last April, Howard Tayler (of 
The Panties: Oh yeah. Someone asked about that, didn’t they? As with many things, this is John Scalzi’s fault. He walked in on our D&D game to say hi, announced he was heading out to by underwear (he forgot his suitcase), and asked if anyone needed anything? Naturally, this led to various smart-ass remarks. I said I just wanted something pink and frilly. John returned an hour later… You can see my lacy XS thong in this pic of me and Kristine Smith. I also have a copy of John’s book, which he signed to me as his “thong buddy.” If I’d been thinking, I would have had us both sign the panties, then donated them to the archives at NIU along with my next batch of manuscripts and other papers.
Origami Yoda. I volunteered to play punching dummy for the Women in Combat panel, but nobody took me up on that 
It was a good panel anyway. And I’ve got to give a special shout-out of thanks to Scott Kennedy, my liaison/keeper/procurer of stuff.
